As it happens in the many outstanding works of literature, Adventures of Huckleberry Finn comprises of several themes developed around a central plot. In the case of Mark Twain’s novel, it is a story of a young boy, Huck, and an escaped slave, Jim with the description of their moral, ethical, and human development during thrilling adventures down the Mississippi River that brings them into many conflicts with greater society. The big society however is not Huck’s major concern, it’s his father who himself is an outsider and a rebel. Pap is the one who makes

Huck’s life much more complicated than all the rest people in the world.

Although being a father is an important role and a huge responsibility in normal families, Pap shows no such concern toward Huck. The only thing he cares about is getting drunk every day until he doesn’t remember himself. Pap is a contrasting figure to Jim who is described in the book as the agent of goodness and honesty. Huck’s father is the example of all worlds’ immorality and filthiness. Even his looks with “long and tangled and greasy hair and rags for clothes” he reminds Huck of his poverty. Pap behaves in a very cruel way with Huck, the boy is often beaten up and physically abused. Not only physical disturbance is an issue between father and son here, Pap is also against Huck’s education. He resents Huck’s ability to read and write, and be emerged in religious studies. The world of Widow Douglas, who agreed to take care of Huck, in Pap’s sick mind, is a dangerous world. He forces Huck to stop his education thus to return to his roots as Pap puts it. He wants his son to solely belong to himself as a thing not a human being, to do only what he orders him. He even keeps him in the forest in the cabin away from the outside world and people who were willing to help, he is locked there like an animal.

Under such abusive eye of Pap, Huck attempts to romanticize his life free from the intrusions of a judgmental society and outside civilization. Away from the enforced rules of school and town, Huck is “free” to exist according to Pap’s rules, which are liquor and theft. In reality of Huck’s existence under Pap, is one where the presence of Pap’s fist and racism saturate all of Huck’s life —where Huck is abused and subject to the poison Pap spills onto the whole society. Pap is criticizing society for trying to take away his son, but at the same time does nothing to protect Huck, he only makes him suffer and feel unwelcome in this life.

Pap shows his inner darkness and inability to love his only son in the passage when he tries to get Huck’s reward money. Pap lies to the judge that he is a “new and changed man” with different life and his eyes are turned to God now. The next morning, however, judge sees him lying dead drunk on his porch with a broken arm back to his old ways. This episode certainly doesn’t depict any fatherly love except Pap’s love for spirits and easy money earned by so much hated society. He would be an almost a comic figure in the novel, if his existence didn’t have such a tragic impact on Huck’s poor heart.

The irony of the novel is multileveled and one of its illustrations is depicted in Pap’s monologue, when he condemns a nation who would allow a black person to vote. This is an unthinkable nonsense to him and yet he has no right to even say things like that. He treats his own son worth than a slave, a morally dead human claims to know what other people should or should not do.

Often Pap gets “too handy with his hick’ry,” and Huck desires to live that way no more. He decides to escape with a slave Jim, who will become a carrying father for Huck during their flee down the river. On their way in the episode described in chapter 9, when they come upon the floating frame-house, they discover a dead man among the various items. After Jim looks over the body, he tells Huck to come in the house, but “doan’ look at his face—because it’s too gashly.” Jim’s gesture here is similar to that of a protective parent. In Chapter the Last, Jim explains that the dead man aboard the house was Pap, and Huck realizes that Pap will not bother or abuse him ever again. For a young boy to have such cruel, as it may seem, toward his dead father is not a common thing. They are totally justified, though, because of the way Pap treated Huck throughout his childhood, because of the absence of love and care which Pap never showed. Pap was like a heavy weight which Huck had to carry everywhere on his small feeble body, but now the weight was gone forever and Huck could breathe without fearing of being slapped for it.

Although Huck has a biological father during almost the whole novel, a reader is convinced that Jim is the one who plays that role much better that Pap. After he tells Huck about his father’s dead body, he helps Huck to come to a right decision on freeing Jim. By doing such he as if inherits his newly found father’s kindness and worthy qualities that his real father never had. This transformation in Huck’s mind and life as a whole declares his rebirth. He is a new person with new moral views and new family.

Jeff Stats
http://www.articlesbase.com/college-and-university-articles/relationship-between-huckleberry-finn-and-his-father-116678.html

Happiness should be a part of relationship. Yet, this may not always be the case. There will be times you feel down you may fight with your girlfriend or your boyfriend. Even married couples discover that their partners are not the best of the species on this planet. That however, should not discourage you from being engaged in a relationship with someone. There will be times that your love for each other will be tested. In worst cases, you might even experience a breakup.

Even before the outset of a breakup, you should try to look for the three signs of a healthy relationship. These signs will let you know if your relationship is still fine.

The first sign of a healthy relationship is that you are passionate for each other. This means that you are still in love with each other as deeply as when you first met. Being passionate with each other also means that you are enjoying each other’s company. This does not necessarily mean that hardly a day passes by without you seeing each other. There may be times that you will be far from each other. True passion, however, is measured by your faithfulness, loyalty and commitment.

Secondly, fighting does not necessarily mean bad if it can settle issues instead of making your partner feeling worse. However some couples may boast that they never fight. You should raise your eyebrows with such pronouncement and ask such couples if they truly know each other and if they are talking with each other. Chances are their answer would be a resounding no.

Don’t worry much if you have differences like most couples. This means that you are transparent and honest with each other. You disclose enough of yourself to generate friction and conflict. If you ever decide to get married, you will need your skills at smoothing out your conflicts and your fights for as long as you stay married.

Lastly, there is no “perfect” relationship. Your relationship is healthy if you know how to sort out your differences and settle your conflicts. But if all you ever do is fight, then something is terribly wrong and breakup is imminent like rain about to fall from an overcast sky.

With these three signs of a healthy relationship, you can gauge your relationship and learn how to prevent breakups and show sincerity between each other.

Teecee Go
http://www.articlesbase.com/relationships-articles/3-signs-of-a-healthy-relationship-checklist-revealed-716265.html

We live in a very difficult world. We are surrounded by criticism and nonsupport and so we are always on the defensive. It seems most of the time we are faced with challenges; prosperity and happiness do not come naturally to most people, they have to be fought for. Yet when people enter into a relationship with the intention of settling down with someone permanently, there is an expectation the relationship will provide a respite from the world and its difficulties. Virtually everyone has an underlying expectation the relationship they get into will be a safe haven. Is this a reasonable expectation? I think so. Actually, I know so.

Others don’t think so, and it is reflected in the processes relationship counselors typically invoke on those who come to them for help. When people are having difficulty in their relationship they sometimes go for marriage or relationship counseling. In their first meeting with a new counselor the couple is asked to explain what brought them there so the counselor can get a handle on their situation. Although it is possible, I have never heard of a case where a couple goes in to see a counselor and the counselor asks them what is good in their relationship. I would guess that approach is pretty rare. After all, we live in a world that focuses on the negative. Most people focus on the removal of obstacles that block the path of the achievement they seek. Counselors typically ask what’s wrong. People who have gone in for help because they are not getting along are now asked to complain about their relationship and their partner. Doesn’t this seem like an odd way to help people get along?

It is a wise and rare relationship counselor who begins the very first meeting by announcing, “The past is over, now is the time to learn the correct behaviors and attitudes required for a healthy and happy relationship.”

Assuming People Know How To Be Married Is A Big Mistake

It’s nobody’s fault when they are not getting along in a relationship or marriage. None of us, or maybe I should say the vast majority of us, had no access to the vital knowledge of what is required to have a good relationship, a good marriage or how to maintain a good family. A lot of people joke about it and many people can give anecdotal tidbits about it, but very few have a manual for marriage. I finally wrote one (Lessons For A Happy Marriage) but it will take time for this essential knowledge to spread. In the meantime the struggles are great and the rescues are few and far between.

Here are 5 tips for those who are thinking about relationship counseling:

1. Choose to focus your attention on the positive attributes of your mate.
2. Hold your tongue. Never criticize the person you love.
3. Recognize your spouse (if you are married) as the most important person in the world.
4. Determine if your mate’s flaws (if you are not married) are deal breakers. If they are, stop torturing each other and make a friendly and clean break.
5. Know for sure that a marriage is meant to be a piece of heaven on earth.

Although both of you have flaws, issues and problems, don’t think it is your job to fix or point out those of your mate’s. Appreciate your mate for who they are rather than for what they can do for you. The next time you see them smile, look in their eyes and say, “I love you.”

Paul Friedman
http://www.articlesbase.com/marriage-articles/relationship-counseling-usually-wont-work-5-tips-716923.html

If you’ve broken up with your girlfriend and she’s in a rebound relationship, how do you get her back?

A rebound relationship is one where she’s dating someone in an attempt to get over you.  Rebound relationships helps keep people from having to face the emotions of going through a breakup.  Those types of relationships are used to help girls move on from their real love.

And that’s the key to getting back with her.  She is in a rebound relationship to deal with the fact she’s not with you.

It really doesn’t matter why she lost you.  It does not matter if it’s her fault or yours.  And it actually doesn’t matter you called off the relationship.  What really matters is that you have a real love.

Because almost all the relationships that are founded on real, true love can be saved.

If she is in a rebound relationship, she will be focusing on what’s wrong with the relationship between you and her.  She’ll most likely be hanging out with a “bad boy” if you were a “good guy”.  If you were into gaming and sports, he’ll probably be into something completely different.

The fact that she’s focusing on your style is great for you for 2 reasons.  Her attention is still on you even though she’s with another guy.  And, it’ll give you a chance to see what she is looking for.

If she is going out with a guy that’s completely different from, it means she is missing something from the relationship she had with you.  You can use the time you have to improve yourself while she’s with the “rebound guy”.

Let her rebound relationship take its course.  As she spends time with the other guy, she will start seeing his flaws.  After a few weeks with the rebound guy, she’ll start missing you.

That’s why you shouldn’t just crawl back to her.  Let her develop the idea that she misses you and the good things about the relationship.  When she is ready to come back, welcome her.  Be the best boyfriend that you can be, but make sure you don’t do the chasing.

Here are a few steps to take when your ex is in a rebound relationship:

1.  Don’t try to persuade her or convince her that you’re the love of her life.  She need to discover this on her own.

2.  Don’t keep apologizing to her.  If you did something terrible, tell her you’re sorry once.  And then move on.  She knows the real reason why she’s with you and why she is in love with you.

3.  Don’t start making promises to her that you will change.  You are who you are and that is why she loves you.

4.  Don’t try to convince her that the breakup wasn’t your fault.  She’ll appreciate that over time.  But only if you haven’t made her spend time and energy defending that it wasn’t her fault.

5.  Make sure you don’t beg her to take you back.

When your ex starts dating someone else after a break up, she’s in a rebound relationship.  You can get her back and make up with her.  But don’t worry.  The rebound relationship is a great sign that she is still in love with you.

Tony Smith
http://www.articlesbase.com/breakup-articles/how-a-rebound-relationship-can-work-in-your-favor-731031.html

Are you kidding me? What do you mean it’s not for everyone? I want a piece of this! Are you sure? We cannot be truly happy without the integration of the shadow and the light. Most people want the light without the darkness. Sorry, impossible. We live in a dualistic world. Life is about integrating all parts of us back to the remembrance of wholeness and the realization that we are Love. We must embrace all parts of ourselves. We must heal with others. We are not meant to heal alone or in isolation, even if we are connecting to God in meditation or prayer. We are spiritual beings having a human experience. We must heal our humanness. This requires lower chakra work which means feeling and releasing fear, shame, guilt, and loneliness. Relationship work is necessary. For now we are concentrating of what Sacred Relationship is and what it is not. Soul Sex is the organic energy that heals separation and empowers us to realize our true human potential. Sacred Relationship and Soul Sex go hand in hand if you dare choose this path.

First let’s talk about Sacred Relationship. What it is not is keeping the peace at all costs. This stymies growth all around. Remember this, if we are not growing we are dying. We are here to grow! Tom Kenyon and Judi Sion speak about their experience in relationship in “The Magdalen Manuscript: The Alchemies of Horus & The Sex Magic of Isis.” “You can actually think you love someone so much that you never call them on their stuff, thinking it would hurt them too much. I’ll tell you what hurts—not calling someone on his or her stuff. That’s what kills and creates disease and compliance to non-growth and disillusionment. When you do not share your truth, one morning you wake up and find yourself living with a stranger, a roommate. This is not the road to Sacred Relationship (Kenyon and Sion, 2002).” The above description is one example of what Sacred Relationship is not!

Sacred Relationship takes courage, (1st chakra and 2nd chakra), and vigilant commitment! “Understand that you are in alchemical process when you are in Sacred Relationship; and you search for pictures, and sometimes when the pictures don’t match, you get scared. As this heat gets turned up and you can’t take the heat, go to another place where the heat is not so strong. Pause and let the world stop; take each others hands, though the last thing you want to do is touch each other in these times; speak the truth about what face is showing itself. Understand that telling the truth is not going to break apart anything. Always stay in truth. It’s going to get hot. Don’t give up. Buy a clutch pedal cover and put it on your altar. Hold hands and walk across the burning coals. And I promise you—you will think you are going to die. And you won’t (Kenyon and Sion, 2002).” As you can see this is not for everyone!

According to “The Alchemy Of Love And Sex” by Lee Lozowick we need to rethink and experience the energy of our charkas differently in order to engage in Soul Sex. The benefits of Sacred Relationship are the joy and happiness that comes from hard and deep soul work. Our relationship will alchemize into a celebration of oneness as we make Love and God with each other. True Love is unattached. It comes from the heart. But it is pumped up by the lower moving center (second chakra) to the seventh chakra in bliss and Soul Sexual union. The heart (the higher feeling center) needs to be open first before the lower moving center (second chakra) is activated. Otherwise, attachment and other dysfunctions can occur. It is also important to realize that the higher thinking center (third eye) is what opens the heart. So the key to Soul Sex and Sacred Relationship is working through the charkas from 1 (lower moving center), 3 (lower feeling center), 5 (lower thinking center), 6 (higher thinking center), 4 (higher feeling center), 2 (higher moving center), to 7 (connection to oneness and the divine). This assures us of proper energy transfer between the charkas (Lozowick, 1996). Obviously, this is not how we normally practice our growth in western culture. If we did, we would access more happiness, Love, and joy!

So you want Love and happiness in your relationship? The shadow says Sacred Relationship and Soul Sex are challenging to say the least, but well worth it if you can commit to transcendence with yourself and your mate. It can get dark at times and can get challenging healing the wounds, especially the sexual ones. Our religious culture and the church has distorted what sex is and deleted the truth in many instances. “In actuality, there is no need to refrain from the sex act in order to practice this form of alchemy. Indeed as Magdalen discusses in the Manuscript, there are ways that the sex act can greatly empower the ascent of sekhem, or ‘that which makes things erect,’ up the spine. For various historical reasons, too complex to go into here, the church separated sex from spirit, but in the ancient Egyptian understanding, they were intimately connected” (Kenyon and Sion, 2002). Thank God! We need to heal the separation. I’m all for this connection. I have experienced glimpses of Sacred Relationship and Soul Sex and know their power of healing and connection to God and Love. The path to oneness through Sacred Relationship and Soul Sex leads to happiness, Love, and joy, eventually. It’s not for everyone, but it’s better late than never for those of us still searching for happiness and higher consciousness in our relationships!

Rusty Stewart, Ph.D., ACHt.
http://www.articlesbase.com/relationships-articles/sacred-relationship-and-soul-sex-equals-joy-and-happiness-eventually-but-the-shadow-says-its-not-for-everyone-756520.html

It is advisable to learn to Love the One you are with for your making up relationship

If you have recently come out of a relationship, heed this word of caution. It may be wise to distance yourself from relationships for a while. Take a breather. The tendency of new singles often is quickly to find someone else to be with. Most ministers and mental health professionals agree that that is not a good idea. It is a colossal mistake!

For some people being in a relationship becomes their “drug of choice.” They skip around from relationship to relationship. Some get stuck. They feel as though they always have to be in a relationship. They develop the dependency of “needing” a relationship. That is not healthy. Some people allow their feelings of insecurity about being alone to keep them stuck, often in an unhealthy relationship.

Our former relationships never cease to provide us with new and exciting questions, the answers to which can lead to the breakthrough necessary for a healthy love relationship in the future. The rewards of personal inquiry are invaluable and can assist us greatly in being ready for another relationship when the time is right.

I believe that every relationship we are in serves a definite purpose. It fulfils a need for us as we fulfil needs for someone else. Remember, we should only look back to see how far we’ve come or to see how much we’ve learned. We can look at our past love relationships and focus on the good we learned from them. I must admit that at times this may be difficult.

Spend time working on you. Work on developing your own self as an individual. The one you are with is you! Reinvent a relationship with yourself. Make it a new and exciting relationship; one you can be proud to carry over into your next relationship with someone else. Nobody wants damaged goods.

Allow time for the healing that is necessary for you to feel comfortable with being alone. That is the only way you can learn how to really be with someone else in the future. After coming out of a love relationship, it is normal to feel rather insecure for a while. It takes a while to adjust to your new beginning. The delayed gratification is worth it. One of the rewards is discovering that the more time you take for yourself, the more love you will have to give to your future love partner.

Choose to be alone for awhile. Being independent enough to be alone is a virtue. Cultivate it. When you can learn to be comfortable with being with yourself, then you may be getting closer to being ready for a healthy love relationship with someone else. During this time of aloneness you will discover a clear distinction between being lonely and being alone.

Being alone can help you in getting comfortable about being with yourself. When you are comfortable about being with yourself, your feelings of loneliness will gradually disappear. Spend some time learning to be good company with you. Avoid the self-created fear of being alone. Accept that we do this to ourselves. It can bring no good into our lives. We allow fear to cause us to withhold ourselves from others. Fear breeds insecurities.

It could be said, for example purposes, that even Tarzan, Lord of the Jungle, was insecure. He would swing from vine to vine, not letting go until the next vine was safely in hand. Does this sound familiar? This may make sense when you are in the jungle. When you are swinging high above the ground, your life depends on it. Your life does not depend, however, on always being in a relationship. The need to be always swinging from one love partner to another is not in your best interest. If you are coming from a love relationship, the last thing you need is another one . . . right away, that is. In this scenario, there is no safety in numbers.

We are so afraid of finding ourselves hanging in midair; we latch onto the first available vine that happens along. Not a good idea! Leap into your greatest fear . . . be by yourself for a while. Take a good look at what “hanging in midair” feels like. You may be surprised! You will be okay. It won’t be the end of the world. Although it may feel like it, that feeling won’t last forever.

It is wise to practice intimacy with “self” during your abstinence from relationships. Pray to know God better. Thank him for the courage to get serious about the relationship you have with you. Get to know God. Get to know you. Give yourself the gift of solitude. When you are alone . . . journal. Get in touch with your true feelings. Work on falling in love with yourself for a change and see how great that feels! Be your own significant other. Practice the art of loving you. Take the precious time out that is necessary to rediscover who you are without a love partner.

You must first learn to be alone and happy before you can be together and happy. Learn that it is possible for you to live alone and not be lonely. Discover how to be self-sufficient. Don’t be dependent on others for your own existence.
Know that when you eventually do connect with someone you can love; your happiness will be enhanced by just knowing that being in the relationship is your choice and not something you need or must have to survive. To have found someone you can share your life with is one of love’s ultimate adventures.

Not having a relationship doesn’t keep you all warm and cuddly at night; however, getting yourself ready for a really great love relationship must be your highest priority. Be true to yourself first, it is well worth the wait. Being alone may call up all the feelings you were afraid you would have if you were ever alone . . . and some you could have never imagined. The pain seems to go on and on, though only if you allow it. Healing takes time. Stay with solitude. Don’t be tempted.

At the end of your tunnel are love-of-self and the healing love that only God can provide. You must attain this awareness before you can be in a healthy love relationship with someone else. In times like these, when you are alone with your feelings, life can feel empty.

You can gain much insight into the power of your attitudes in the stillness of looking inward. Your body believes every word you say. Your words and thoughts govern how you feel today and how you will feel tomorrow. A quiet and peaceful mind takes form as a quiet and peaceful body. Peace, be still.

See what it feels like to walk hand in hand with you. Give yourself permission to do what may feel risky. Discover new ways of thinking and being. To allow intimacy to be present in a relationship with another, you must first seek intimacy with yourself. Some of our clearest thinking about relationships can occur when we are not in a relationship. Our mind is often sharper when informed by our own feelings. We are more humble and acutely more in touch with the hurts of the past. We are far more open to new ideas.

Take advantage of this opportunity to learn all you can about yourself and what makes a healthy love relationship. It is in the search for what it takes to have a healthy love relationship that we become more receptive to listening for new ways to make our relationships work better in the future. The very process of searching opens up many new options. Make having a relationship with yourself your number one priority. Then, and only then, can you move on to what’s next!

Indeed, life is short. Don’t let another day go by without taking a chance on happiness. You will never know until you try, so remember to make a move today. It can change or affect the rest of your life, therefore, at the very least, you can try to come out something for your ex love partner during your weekend plans. With a little practice, perseverance and patience, I believe that your relationship could be enhanced with the tips that I have shared earlier. If you have faced any problems with your loved ones, do not hesitate to visit this piece of article again.

I really have a strong belief that if you can understand what I have explained and applied what you have learnt from this piece of article, your problems can be eventually solved and your making up relationship can become more stable and stronger. I wish all the best for your making up relationship with your partner. Do always remember to spread word of mouth to your fellow friends for supporting the decision of having making up than breaking up.

Is getting my ex back possible?

Watch a video that shows you exactly what you must NEVER do, what you should do to get your ex back and why at Getting My Ex Back Video

You will also learn how to reverse the situation if you have already done those things that should NEVER be done.

dhlim88
http://www.articlesbase.com/dating-articles/it-is-advisable-to-learn-to-love-the-one-you-are-with-for-your-making-up-relationship-589046.html

When we are young and life seems to stretch out in front of us for ever, then relationships that start feeling clingy are quickly brushed aside. After all; you reason that there are so many fish in the sea and there is always a better looking guy or girl to flirt with, and chase after. You would never dream of wondering how to start a serious relationship because that is the last thing on your mind. Young women mature a lot faster than men and will start looking for lasting relationships rather than one night stands and passing flings long before young men will.

I always choose the wrong partners

You may want to know how to start a serious relationship because with your luck so far you seem always to choose the wrong type of men/ women and they are attracted to you like flies. The first steps on how to start a serious relationship would be to avoid the places where this sort of bad boy/girl type hangs out because clearly you will not find the right caliber of person there. For more details you can visit at www.the-spam-files.com. There are legitimate online dating sites that you can have a look through, and perhaps meet your new long term partner this way. The other option is going out with girlfriends and boyfriends of your own age who are over the rock and roll relationship fling stages, and are also looking to settle down into meaningful relationships.

Does a Serious Relationship mean the end of my freedom?

Relationships are built on trust, sharing, love, compromise and also giving your partner space. There are going to be arguments and breakups and when this happens you will start feeling lost and adrift, and will seek to make up again as soon as possible, especially if you have broken up for something trivial. There may be a little jealousy between you, and arguments over certain issues will arise, but this is all part of building a long term loving strong relationship. It is important to take care too not become too possessive over your girlfriend or boyfriend, and in a serious relationship where you know you love each other, this should not happen anyway.

A serious relationship is valuable.

http://www.101-happy-relationships.com
http://www.fire-itup.com

Serious long term relationships that have been built on love and trust are precious. This is even more so in our fast pace modern lives where no one wants to be alone. There is also no need to panic when you have started a serious relationship that marriage is going to be rushed into. You can be together for many years before even considering this huge step. By the time this decision does come around you will already know your relationship well enough to take it to the next level. You can also visit at www.tips-getting-healthy.com. There are lots of great guides and help that you can read that will help you understand how to keep a powerful long lasting serious relationship together and well worth investing.

PARMOD BANSAL
http://www.articlesbase.com/dating-articles/start-a-serious-long-term-relationship-678479.html

Understanding, respect and adulation are important aspects of a successful relationship. If you are unable to connect physically as well as emotionally with your love interest, then sooner or later you will have to look towards doing a lot of compromises. Hence, one must try and know his/her partner in entirety before committing.

Establish Goals

Both the partners should try and lay out specific goals for each other. It can range from simple things such as helping our love in some task or difficult things such as standing by each other when the relatives or friends of one of them are facing tough times. Such simple things tend to make a lot of difference in the long run. Spend some time all by yourself each and every day and seek the fulfillment of newer goals for the purpose of improving the relationship further. Amongst all these goals, there is one advice relationship counselors most commonly give. Make it a point to express your love towards your love more often and do it consciously.

Take Ownership

Every relationship has to pass through good and bad times. It is no one else but only you who has the control to change situations. One should understand that he/she is entirely responsible for where his/her relationship is heading. You should be absolutely clear with what you want out of the relationship and all your actions should be totally consistent with your expectations. One should also understand that no one is perfect and hence, each other’s shortcomings should be negated by the strength and faith of the relationship.

Stand By Each Other

This is one of the most important advice relationship counselors provide to their clients. Whether a relationship succeeds or not, entirely depends upon whether it is able to fulfill the needs and requirements of both the persons involved. This can only occur through frequent and good communication each and every day as it will help in understanding the dynamics of each other.

Become Good Friends

You should develop a strong bond of friendship with your mate. It usually happens that people tend to move away from the holiness of friendship on account of the burden of the expectations in a relationship. Cracking jokes and sharing silly things about each other should be taken as a relationship building activity. Such activities are very common between friends but somehow individuals in a relationship forget to apply the same openness when it comes to them.

Arrange Surprises

Surprises are a very sweet way of expressing your love to each other and adding a tinge of romance to your relationship every now and then. Some simple surprises that one can look forward to are preparing favorite cuisine, complimenting just like that, gifting flowers and cards and so on. Such unexpected gestures make you to be perceived as a spontaneous person rather than a predictable one which definitely helps in spicing up the relationship.

A simple advice relationship counselors usually give is related to the fact that men and women are inherently different. One is more expressive and other is more less, both having different needs and expectations from their partner. For the relationship to succeed in the long term, both of them should invest a lot of time in knowing about each other so that the compatibility is adequately measured up leading to a strong, beautiful and loved relationship.

PeterHaliday
http://www.articlesbase.com/dating-articles/tips-for-building-a-strong-relationship-687844.html

Several years ago I was sitting at the gossip table at a dinner party and as usual the conversation turned to relationships, as every girl tried to fluff up her love life so she could call bragging rights for the night; it seemed that each began to drift off and with the glazed, starry eyed look that betrayed their outer persona. It was obvious they were unfulfilled in their relationships and were imagining their dream guy, the ones they didn’t have. The one question that seemed to permeate through the air and was on every girls mind was “For god’s sake what do we women want in a man that makes him so hard to find?” Then like a shot in the arm as if from years of experience or perhaps trial and error a wise older woman (I’ll call her Melinda) gave a rather short answer that didn’t quite make sense to me until several years and quite a few relationships later. The answer was quite simple that it seemed to hit you like a brick wall; ladies want a MAN (yes a real man warrants caps). At first glance what comes to mind is the knight in shinning armor that every fluttering heart teenage girl dreams of; but upon further analysis and thought it’s not really a hero figure that women are looking for, its what the knight in shinning armor represents; stability, respect and someone you can look up to in your time of need.

A relationship is multi-faceted – physical, emotional and social; if it’s lacking in any one area it is bound to fail. If you’re great in one area and lacking in another; the deficient facets will begin to gnaw at the relationship until it eventually dissolves. Granted sex has a considerable part in a relationship; it is the epitome of the physical facet of the relationship. But, many guys attempt to raise the façade of great sex (as if they were the only one’s that could offer it) or the size of their member as the lynch pin that keeps a relationship going. If that’s what you believe; then I’ve got a golden colored bridge I’d love to sell ya! If you’re only contribution to the relationship is the 5″ friend between your legs; then you should be well aware that there is plastic out there that can keep going and going and going long after you’re fast asleep.

You’re probably asking yourself well, what exactly does Jackie mean by a MAN? If that’s what’s on your mind then at the very least I can honestly say your on the path to finding out what women want (can’t guarantee you’ll get there; but, I’ll do my best to get you there). Although many may argue that men and women are very much the same I would also argue that through history and genetics we are very similar but with completely different needs. Since the dawn of time men have been the protectors’ suppliers and women the nurturing mother, the soft heart and the caring touch. Notice the yin/yang relationship? One side compliments the other in every way; that is how nature works. Does this take away from either character? NO. Does that mean that women are not suppliers or protectors? NO. I am in no way stating that men are strong and women are weak and helpless. If that is your assertion; I would ask if you have ever seen a lioness in the wild protecting her cubs, there is absolutely nothing more furious. Obviously in this day and age the “hunter gather” role no longer applies in the economic and social sense; both sexes (for all intents and purposes) are equal; which is a great achievement on our part as human beings and a society. Does this mean that we can just forget the millions of years of evolution? I would say once again no; no matter how equal we become or how unisex life in the modern world becomes our physical, emotional and social needs are still fairly engrained in genetics. While the female executive may be strong and command authority in the workplace; I would highly doubt that after that one particularly rough day at work she doesn’t for even a single instant want to run home into the strong arms of her loving companion just for a hint of solitude or protection from the outside world. Does this make her any less of an equal, not a chance; it makes her human and a woman with human and womanly emotional needs.

Emotional needs have been stressed through the media as the key to a woman’s heart. Through society you may have been nurtured to believe that women want a sensitive and caring man. This statement is true to some extent, but not to the extent that some men have carried it to. We women do admire a sensitive and caring man; but, there is a fine line between sensitive and spineless. Most women want a man who is caring but when it comes down to it if he’s too in touch with his feelings to the point where they feel they are having a conversation with a girlfriend then he his sensitivity has gone too far. If women want that much sensitivity they can always turn to their girlfriends. Now don’t misunderstand my assertion, my statement above doesn’t give you the right to be a jerk. Jerks never get much. Again, please note the fine line between a MAN and a girlfriend or a MAN and jerk. A MAN must be sensitive and caring without overstepping the bounds of his masculinity. Women want to feel like they are with some one they can trust to protect them. If you’re the type of guy who is willing to sit with her and cry about every single girly moment that she would rather talk about with her girlfriend, I doubt she would feel comfortable with you. You have willingly stripped yourself of your masculinity and entered into the feminine realm. That’s her girlfriends role not yours. There is a fine line between what a lady looks for from her girlfriends and what she looks for in her MAN. As her MAN you should be there for her in those moments as well, but in a different capacity as her shelter from the world; her own rock in the craziness of the everyday hysteria we call life. This is just one of the major things I have heard from women with regard to the men they have had in their lives and why they are no longer there. In short they no longer felt like they were with a MAN, these men had relegated themselves to more of a buddy role. With the advent of the metro-sexual male in our society this has been a constant grievance amongst a lot of my lady friends; the men tend to worry more about their own eyebrows than their ladies do. When with her MAN a woman wants to feel feminine; if her MAN is as, or more feminine than she feels herself to be; then that is a relationship that is on the road to no where.

Respect is another factor in relationships that women not only want for themselves but want to have it for their MAN. I believe Aretha Franklin put it quite nicely; R-E-S-P-E-C-T, find out what it means to your woman. A relationship without respect from both sides is one that is not built to last. A woman with no respect for the man she is with will never feel secure enough to allow herself to be fully his. Respect is the main thing a man must offer a woman and through his actions with her, he will earn hers in return. Respect is not something you receive by being chauvinistic and commanding; it is the one thing in a relationship that has to be earned. If you fulfill your role as a MAN as described above you should have no problem getting respect from your lady. As a word of warning though, I have seen and heard over and over tales of men letting their self respect be trampled upon by their lady and simply mistaking it for love or being a caring man If your opinion carries no weight with her then you definitely have no respect and no respect, no love. She inherently wants to give you respect but, ultimately it is your actions that either allow her to give it or take it away. One way (of many ways) to not lose respect in your relationship if you feel you are right, stand your ground. Giving in on every single aspect of the relationship makes you irrelevant and spineless. Time and again I’ve been in situations where I feel I am right and I argue, only for my significant other to stand his ground; it feels great to get some tension going in a relationship. I at least know that he has an opinion and that he is not willing to allow me to blindly ignore his opinion. It adds a certain unquantifiable dynamic to the relationship. Again, I am not saying that you stick your ground just to annoy or prove your manliness. Once you begin doing that you’re no more than a stubborn child who is not getting what he wants and again your respect has vanished. On the other hand, If you’re right and stick to your guns, on a subconscious and conscious level you display to her that you are confident and capable enough to stand up for her in her time of need. Respect like trust once lost it is extremely difficult to return.

Seeing beautiful ladies with not so aesthetically pleasing guys is not an uncommon occurrence. All things being equal I would say that women are not as superficial as men and that the fellow she is with fulfills something emotional and social for her in addition to the physical that no other man could offer; he has found a way to be her MAN. He has earned her respect, admiration and love; tough tasks to accomplish for sure, yet once the correct balance is struck between masculinity, security and respectability you are home free. We women may be emotional, irrational and down right unpredictable in our choices but once we believe you’re capable and deserving of our emotions you will get one hundred fold of what you give in return and it can be pure bliss for both yourself and her. Obviously relationships are complex and no one will have all of the answers; the dependencies are incredibly complex on you, the lady you’re with, her past, the impression you’ve left upon her and her views on life in general. The examples I gave above are specific to many instances I have heard over the years from other ladies searching for their MAN, there are many others like them but the main point remains the same. Find what works for you in your particular relationship. As Melinda stated so many years ago at the dinner party; women are searching for a MAN, fulfill her physical, emotional and social needs (as well as expect that in return) and you’re on your way. Hopefully, Melinda’s words of wisdom that only began to make sense to me year’s later start you on a clear path to an exciting relationship that goes way beyond your combined wildest imaginations.

Jackie O.
http://www.articlesbase.com/sexuality-articles/what-women-want-guidelines-to-live-by-in-your-relationship-71596.html

Kindness is something that is often forgotten in a relationship. As we progress in our relationships and get more comfortable with our partners we tend to forget about the simple things that show we really care. We start to assume we no longer need to show our love and that our partner simply just knows we love them. Being kind in a relationship can go along way, though.

Many relationship problems stem from getting too comfortable. We start to forget about our partner and no longer seek to gain their approval, because we already have it. This comfort level can lead to some very bad behavior.

We start to forget what respect and kindness can mean to our partner. We start to take for granted that they will let us slide by without any gesture of love or kindness. When the kindness goes out of a relationship it opens doors for behaviors that are less then desirable. This can spell big trouble for a relationship.

Being kind in a relationship is about showing the other person you respect them. Kindness is something you choose, so it really says something about how you feel about your partner. Kindness comes form love and so by being kind in a relationship you are also showing love.

Kindness helps people to feel like they are valuable. It makes them feel cared for and like they really mean something to you. Being kind in a relationship means being attentive, supportive, understanding and honored. It is also protective. It is a way to keep your partner feeling good and happy.

Kindness can be shown in many different ways. It can be shown through words or actions. It can be how you approach them or how you tackle an issue between you. It can be something simple like picking up after them or doing something small for them. Kindness can show through in even the smallest of ways, but its impact can be huge.

Being kind is about thinking kind. You have to actually work to be kind. It is not something that really comes naturally. You have to be very attentive in order to show kindness. It takes some work, but it well worth it when you consider all it can do for a relationship.

Kindness in a relationship can really help strength the relationship. It can help make the bond between partners stronger. It can help to revive love and make the relationship that much better. Kindness can do many things and it really isn’t that hard to input a little kindness into your interactions with your partner on a daily basis. You will soon find the many benefits of kindness make it well worth the effort.

Jane Saeman
http://www.articlesbase.com/dating-articles/being-kind-in-a-relationship-goes-a-long-way-134054.html